Anyhoo, they are selling everything with a 21 percent discount today,  and we had had an eye on an Ektorp sofabed to replace the sorry thing we have in our living room; with a potential saving of over 180 pounds who could resist?

So, having endured a 22 hour travelthon, we decided to wake up the next morning at first light and make our way to IKEA on the North Circular. Three (THREE!) hours later we were the proud owners of a spanking new sofa (subject to delivery). Oh, and a new Tobbot post

So, here are my ten reasons NOT TO EVER VISIT IKEA:

1. Over a thousand people are in the place at any one time, thus ensuring that you don't so much as browse but shuffle through their shop-displays,

2. Their charming manner of labelling everything in Swedish (what the hell's a 'Beddinge' when it's at home anyway?) confuses the heck out of me!

3. The layout: a great way for IKEA to ensure that you see everything they sell. It also disorientates the unwary, leading to Grumpy Husband Syndrome. This is when after wandering through aisles of similar-looking tat, your male-half starts to grouse at every turn. What started off as an agreeable interchange of stimulating ideas about your new bedroom degenerate into, "just tell me what you want and I'll buy it!" This is easily remedied by sitting Grumpy Husband in a corner with a mug of tea and a copy of the Sun.

4. Funny how that simple yet charming idea can cost so much.

5. And the stuff you really like is the most expensive in the range.

6. Only once you've queued to order it, queued yet again to pay for it, and finally, queued at the external depot to pick it up, the man at the counter tells you they're out of stock, and he'll arrange a refund.

7. Once you have finally taken it home, the flat-packed table is missing a leg and three screws. Taking it back, they offer a refund. Only problem is, you've opened the pack. Which attracts a 30% service charge.

8. Once assembled, the furniture can never be disassembled again, as it will never fit quite as tightly.

9. The North Circular. On a Saturday. With a pounding headache. And it's hot.

10 The fact is that of all the crappy furniture stores in the country, you know in your heart of hearts that IKEA do produce good stuff, and it's reasonably priced. It's just that the whole process is so soul-destroying...

...and you know you'll go back again. Soon.

Kill me now.

Tobbot, aka Tobstv